We’ve all had those cravings… whether it’s something sweet, something salty, fast food to soda pop! I’ve always been addicted to junk food/processed food… the more it was bad for me, the more I craved it! WHY? Because it tastes good and for me most importantly, it’s convenient!! I don’t like to cook, like many of us out there. If I could go get fast food somewhere it made my life much easier. The worst thing I had to do was sit in my car and wait in line for the drive thru. I could have my food in just minutes and be on my way to eating and divulging into my decadent sin.
I was the typical person saying, “I didn’t have a food addiction”. People would ask me all the time if I was an “emotional” eater… my response was always, “No, I eat when I’m happy, when I’m sad, no matter the occasion”! I ate because I was hungry!! I was hungry ALL the time! And my fast food addiction was out of convenience and not wanting to take the time to cook my meals, not because I was addicted, or so I thought. But my food addiction was not just for fast food but sweets as well… double whammy! I could go to the store and literally look in my cart and not have anything in there but junk! Cookies, cake, cereal, processed food, and I would always look over my shoulder to see who I might run into in the store and be embarrassed about what was in my cart! I didn’t want people to “judge” me! Ha! I knew what I was doing to my body subconsciously but I wasn’t ready to come to terms with it.
What is a food addict? Addiction of any kind is a behavior. Being addicted to food is no different than being addicted to drugs, alcohol, gambling or shopping. It is a behavior. Being a food addict myself I’ve made a million excuses for my behavior! Food for me is a reward in any state of mind I have been in. Food has always been my comfort, my place of acceptance from the world. Just like any other addiction food gives me that quick gratification and the sense of feeling good in that moment. How did I know I was an addict? Because I couldn’t just stop! I needed the rush I got from the food I was eating. I sneaked around and hid my addiction. I would hide candy bar wrappers in the trash, under other pieces of trash. I would hide fast food sacks in the trunk of my car after I ate it and then throw it out later when no one would know. Until the day I got busted by doing that! The humiliation I felt when I was found out! Standing there with no words to say. I knew I had a problem. But I didn’t want to give up how food made me feel. I just had to get better at hiding it and not make the same mistake by getting caught again. Of course I never thought about how this was all effecting my health and what I was doing to my body. You can’t eat that much food and not gain weight. And boy, let me tell you… I gained a lot of weight! I became very complacent in my life. Same routine, same bad habits, no change for good.
I am a food addict no denying it, no running from it! Every day is a choice for me… every day my behavior towards food does define me and where I want to be!
I created this blog to help others that struggle with their weight and food control issues by sharing my experiences. My goal is to help others by showing them that they are not alone in their journey and there is hope to get past it and live your life! I’ve been through the gamut and I will explain all as we go… it IS a marathon and not a sprint… so stayed tuned… there is more to come!